The Long Night
So today is my oldest sons 2nd birthday and it is to be a great day; however, things began stacking against this prospect very early in the day.
Now before I get started on this post I just want to say one thing. To some this post may sound like I am complaining but what kind of blogger would I be if I only recounted the good days in this blog and not the not so good days. Especially considering the nature of my title and the nature of...well life. These really are just the things that mothers go through, and I am sure that just about every mom who reads this post nodding their heads remembering at least one time (if not many more) they went through the same thing.
It all began at approximately 12:40am. This is when my 4 month old woke up crying for the second time since she was put to bed, I myself had only been in bed for about an hour and a half. All she usually needs is a little cuddling and nursing and back to bed she goes; sleeping, most night, until about 6am. This night however was not to be like most nights.
After getting up with her 2 more times I eventually moved myself downstairs into her room at 2:30, so that I would be closer and not have to go up and down the stairs if she continued to wake up just as I would get comfortable in bed and begin sleeping. And she did continue to wake up, very upset, I couldn't bring myself to just let her cry (although I was very close) because I could tell it was not just her wanting attention, but that there was something wrong. We both did eventually get a few hours of sleep when I finally let her sleep in my arms, this was however, not enough sleep to get me cheerfully through the day.
So I spent the rest of the day lacking much needed sleep. This is not usually too bad if we are just spending the day at home, (because what else does a stay at home mom do but lay around in her pjs watching soaps all day...uhh no, as my 2yr old would say) however we needed to be in town by 8:45am. And we did make it and the morning went fine, thanks to a cup of well brewed coffee. By the afternoon we were home and the 2 yr old was headed to bed for his nap, and me and the younger one set off on another sleepless afternoon adventure.
I would be lying if I told you I never got frustrated or phoned my mom crying after the 2 yr old got up from a 3 hour nap and the little one had spent less then 10 minutes in her crib sleeping, resulting in no nap for mommy.
Now I am not looking for pity, these are just one of those things that you face when you decide to have children. I will admit my strength and patience does get tested at these times...and to be honest this is minor compared to some horror stories I have heard, but each time I go through something like this or hear a story from another mom I realize that no matter how much we feel like we will never make and we won't be able to handle anymore, miraculously we do. Like a friend of mine said the other day, after she had had a few particularly bad days "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming."
Sometimes we all have days when we just can't take it anymore, we are thoroughly spent. Yet by the grace of God we make it through. It reminds me of a magnate we had on the fridge when i was little, of a frog hanging on to the end of a rope and it said something about when you reach the end of your rope let go because God will catch you. I remember it taking me a long time as I child to understand when that silly little magnate meant, and sometimes I think I still do. Too often I just keep clinging to the rope with all my strength when God is there to help with His strength. I did not do a very good job at asking God for help today...besides pleading with Him to make my daughter sleep :) but maybe tomorrow will be better.
Just so you don't think that I forgot, I did try to give my son a special day despite the lack of sleep. He really is a gem...when he is not being grumpy and I wouldn't trade either of my kids for the world...(here is where I would insert something cheeky but my brain function is not up to the task) So it is off to bed for me. Please pray my little princess doesn't want to pull another all nighter, at least not for a few more days.
Today: I have had better
Now before I get started on this post I just want to say one thing. To some this post may sound like I am complaining but what kind of blogger would I be if I only recounted the good days in this blog and not the not so good days. Especially considering the nature of my title and the nature of...well life. These really are just the things that mothers go through, and I am sure that just about every mom who reads this post nodding their heads remembering at least one time (if not many more) they went through the same thing.
It all began at approximately 12:40am. This is when my 4 month old woke up crying for the second time since she was put to bed, I myself had only been in bed for about an hour and a half. All she usually needs is a little cuddling and nursing and back to bed she goes; sleeping, most night, until about 6am. This night however was not to be like most nights.
After getting up with her 2 more times I eventually moved myself downstairs into her room at 2:30, so that I would be closer and not have to go up and down the stairs if she continued to wake up just as I would get comfortable in bed and begin sleeping. And she did continue to wake up, very upset, I couldn't bring myself to just let her cry (although I was very close) because I could tell it was not just her wanting attention, but that there was something wrong. We both did eventually get a few hours of sleep when I finally let her sleep in my arms, this was however, not enough sleep to get me cheerfully through the day.
So I spent the rest of the day lacking much needed sleep. This is not usually too bad if we are just spending the day at home, (because what else does a stay at home mom do but lay around in her pjs watching soaps all day...uhh no, as my 2yr old would say) however we needed to be in town by 8:45am. And we did make it and the morning went fine, thanks to a cup of well brewed coffee. By the afternoon we were home and the 2 yr old was headed to bed for his nap, and me and the younger one set off on another sleepless afternoon adventure.
I would be lying if I told you I never got frustrated or phoned my mom crying after the 2 yr old got up from a 3 hour nap and the little one had spent less then 10 minutes in her crib sleeping, resulting in no nap for mommy.
Now I am not looking for pity, these are just one of those things that you face when you decide to have children. I will admit my strength and patience does get tested at these times...and to be honest this is minor compared to some horror stories I have heard, but each time I go through something like this or hear a story from another mom I realize that no matter how much we feel like we will never make and we won't be able to handle anymore, miraculously we do. Like a friend of mine said the other day, after she had had a few particularly bad days "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming."
Sometimes we all have days when we just can't take it anymore, we are thoroughly spent. Yet by the grace of God we make it through. It reminds me of a magnate we had on the fridge when i was little, of a frog hanging on to the end of a rope and it said something about when you reach the end of your rope let go because God will catch you. I remember it taking me a long time as I child to understand when that silly little magnate meant, and sometimes I think I still do. Too often I just keep clinging to the rope with all my strength when God is there to help with His strength. I did not do a very good job at asking God for help today...besides pleading with Him to make my daughter sleep :) but maybe tomorrow will be better.
Just so you don't think that I forgot, I did try to give my son a special day despite the lack of sleep. He really is a gem...when he is not being grumpy and I wouldn't trade either of my kids for the world...(here is where I would insert something cheeky but my brain function is not up to the task) So it is off to bed for me. Please pray my little princess doesn't want to pull another all nighter, at least not for a few more days.
Today: I have had better
There's something about hearing that other moms have tough times that make me feel comforted, like I'm not alone. I should probably wish that everyone's lives were easy and their kids perfect, and somewhere in my heart I do, but only if mine get the perfect bug too. I'll be praying sleepiness on your house. :-)
ReplyDeleteYup! Erica said it! There is comfort in knowing im not the only one. My son just turned 2 in september, and only JUST started sleeping through the night. He has never been a sleeper, or a napper. He would be up all night and sleep 20 min in the day. my mom and hubby got many sobbing phone calls/convos about how tired i was! I feel like a whole new person lately. My babies were 18 months apart, and Ashlyn didn't start to sleep through the night till she was 2... having gone 3.5 years with at least 2 nightly wake ups, im glad to be moving on to a more rested stage of their lives. I love my children dearly, but I love it when they sleep!!!! Just know Ashley, I DOES GET BETTER! :) Praying for the Sandman to make a visit to you tonight!
ReplyDeleteOh, dear friend, I am glad that you share the challenging days with us. We're all in this sleepy mommy boat together!
ReplyDelete