Hello...It's me...I was wondering...if you would like to meet.
I have been thinking of this post for a while and due to current circumstances I feel its time to address an issue. That issue is Friendship.
There are some very wonderful friends that I have made over the years. Friends from diapers, friends from pre-teen turmoil, friends from college. These friendships grew over the years from the hours and hours spent playing, dreaming, scheming, and crying. Hours and hours spent in each others company, in the same classroom, at each other homes, road trips, sleepovers, talking through difficult stuff. These friendship have received the hours and hours available in our childhood to develop these deep connections. I hold these friendship so incredibly dear to my heart, even though there are so many miles that separate me from these 'old' friends today, they are relationships forged in flame.
Then something happened after college...things like husbands, homes, jobs and kids started to take precedence on my time. Time...time that used to be so abundant, was now delicately divide between new requirements and expectations of adulthood. That time that you need to develop a strong deep friends that goes beyond "Hi, how are you?" I mourned this as a new mom in a new city and a new church. I wanted a 'friend', but I didn't know how to find one, and those I did find who I connected with were just as short on time as I was.
How on earth do you grow a friendship on, if you are lucky, a few hours a week, or a few texts here or there?
If I break it down, as a child/teen if I went to school with someone I wanted to make friends with them we had 30 hours a week together at school, that adds up to approximately 1200 hours a year. This doesn't even begin to take into account the countless hours spent together on weekends and after school. Now even getting 1 or 2 hours a week with an adult friend is a treat.....Ummm that's only 52-150 hrs (if you are lucky) a year!!!
*ahhhh* Building friendships as an adult is TOUGH!! and it has to do with time. And time is that thing that is in short supply, not just in parenthood but also just as an adult.
Who you chose to spend your time with, those precious free hours, says a lot about you and it says a lot about that person.
Friendship is on my heart the last little while because this week I have to say good-bye to a friend who is moving away. She is one of the best friends I have made since becoming a mom and I have appreciated the time....and the coffee...we have shared together. As well as the friendship our girls have made. She has proven to me that it is possible to create a strong friendship of depth and encouragement even in the midst of the stress, busyness and chaos of motherhood/adulthood. We have given our time to each other (what little we had) and our friendship grew and the friendship of our girls have grown. I am so thankful for that. I never expected to find another friend to fit into that special friend place (you know the ones who "know you" the ones you can tell anything to and ask anything from, the ones you could call and would get on plane for you if you needed them).
So I guess that is that. As I embark on having to put time into new friendships I am thankful for all of my friends, near and far. The ones I can call anytime to catch up and dream about the future. So be brave, take the time to make new friends (if you have space for more) you may be surprised by the gems God will bring into your life. The friendships he will bring along to help you through the challenging times of life, to celebrate the achievements (like getting out without the kids) and remind you that your time is valuable to someone.
Take care my friend, save a bed for us, we will come visit you soon!
There are some very wonderful friends that I have made over the years. Friends from diapers, friends from pre-teen turmoil, friends from college. These friendships grew over the years from the hours and hours spent playing, dreaming, scheming, and crying. Hours and hours spent in each others company, in the same classroom, at each other homes, road trips, sleepovers, talking through difficult stuff. These friendship have received the hours and hours available in our childhood to develop these deep connections. I hold these friendship so incredibly dear to my heart, even though there are so many miles that separate me from these 'old' friends today, they are relationships forged in flame.
Then something happened after college...things like husbands, homes, jobs and kids started to take precedence on my time. Time...time that used to be so abundant, was now delicately divide between new requirements and expectations of adulthood. That time that you need to develop a strong deep friends that goes beyond "Hi, how are you?" I mourned this as a new mom in a new city and a new church. I wanted a 'friend', but I didn't know how to find one, and those I did find who I connected with were just as short on time as I was.
How on earth do you grow a friendship on, if you are lucky, a few hours a week, or a few texts here or there?
If I break it down, as a child/teen if I went to school with someone I wanted to make friends with them we had 30 hours a week together at school, that adds up to approximately 1200 hours a year. This doesn't even begin to take into account the countless hours spent together on weekends and after school. Now even getting 1 or 2 hours a week with an adult friend is a treat.....Ummm that's only 52-150 hrs (if you are lucky) a year!!!
*ahhhh* Building friendships as an adult is TOUGH!! and it has to do with time. And time is that thing that is in short supply, not just in parenthood but also just as an adult.
Who you chose to spend your time with, those precious free hours, says a lot about you and it says a lot about that person.
Friendship is on my heart the last little while because this week I have to say good-bye to a friend who is moving away. She is one of the best friends I have made since becoming a mom and I have appreciated the time....and the coffee...we have shared together. As well as the friendship our girls have made. She has proven to me that it is possible to create a strong friendship of depth and encouragement even in the midst of the stress, busyness and chaos of motherhood/adulthood. We have given our time to each other (what little we had) and our friendship grew and the friendship of our girls have grown. I am so thankful for that. I never expected to find another friend to fit into that special friend place (you know the ones who "know you" the ones you can tell anything to and ask anything from, the ones you could call and would get on plane for you if you needed them).
So I guess that is that. As I embark on having to put time into new friendships I am thankful for all of my friends, near and far. The ones I can call anytime to catch up and dream about the future. So be brave, take the time to make new friends (if you have space for more) you may be surprised by the gems God will bring into your life. The friendships he will bring along to help you through the challenging times of life, to celebrate the achievements (like getting out without the kids) and remind you that your time is valuable to someone.
Take care my friend, save a bed for us, we will come visit you soon!
Comments
Post a Comment