Everyone Hates Cheese and Broccoli Soup
Apparently my family doesn't like cheese and broccoli soup. I enjoy it and it brings back lots of memories from my childhood, but tonight there was nothing pleasant in my thoughts regarding cheese and broccoli soup. My husband doesn't like it (something I never knew until yesterday) Nadiya (who eats everything) didn't like it, and honestly I just didn't bother with Zach because I was too discouraged and knew that he would refuse as well.
So here is the whole story. Tonight was supposed to be left-overs night (I have been meal planning and it has actually been going quite well and has been extremely helpful in eliminating last minute scrambles at 4:30) right...back to left-overs. Apparently there was nothing in the fridge that anyone wanted to eat for left-overs, including "the soup". I don't know why I got so miserable but it just came over me. There really was nothing to eat for supper, I wasn't hungry, but I knew the kids needed to eat so out of desperation I tried to feed them "the soup." Zach was putting up a stink and wouldn't even sit at the table and Nadiya, so respectfully dumped her bowl and even refused to eat the soda cracker that had come in contact with the vile liquid.
So in my little fit of rage and self-pity I gathered up the bowls dumped them in the garbage, scooped up the dumped soup with my hands and threw it away as well. All the while my husband is standing quietly watching, just waiting to see if in my fit I threw out the rest of the container as well. And I will admit I was going to because I was feeling sorry for myself, but after considering the time and money I put into making it I decided to put the rest in the fridge and I would have lunch for MYSELF tomorrow.
This whole time I am planning this blog and ready to vent about the injustice I experienced as I made my children toast and grapes for supper and "the soup" sits abandoned in the garbage. My husband quietly watched the children as they ate and got them more grapes and some cheese as they asked, while I proceeded to clean the kitchen (I am a cleaner when I am mad).
After supper is finished and the children are content and I am feeling quite unappreciated Nate gets Zach from the table and tells him to say Thank-you, which he does; and then he tells him to "tell mom she is great." He looks and me and says "Mom is grape!" How could I not smile and not feel like I actually am loved.
I have been pondering lately how as a teenager it seemed that all I needed to do was find someone to love and get married and all my needs would be met and I would feel great about myself, and not feel lonely. Some of these things are true. I am blessed to have a wonderful husband who loves me and works hard so I can stay at home. It is beautiful to have someone to share life with, someone to help make decision and someone to share the in the joy and the pain we each face. And no most of the time I am not lonely (because I know Nate is always there).
However, everything is not perfect. Marriage and children bring their own set of challenges. When we get married, even though we know better, we still believe that life will be easier. In some ways it truly is and in other ways things get harder. I know that every woman out there who runs a household; feeding, cleaning, chauffeuring and myriad of other duties can feel unappreciated. I know this happens to me, it happened tonight. I give and give and give and sometimes it seems like it is just expected and it is not appreciated; the time and the effort and the selfless choices I have to make to ensure that my home is in some state of order. Now I do I always do it all right? Do I always make the selfless decision? No, sometimes I am selfish, but believe me when I am it is evident in the state of my home :) and even in the moods of my children.
Life runs better around here when I am serving, so why do I feel like my serving is taken for granted? Because we all take servants for granted. My husbands serves me everyday when he gets up and faithfully goes to work and sometimes I take that for granted. We are created to serve and we need to serve to feel fulfilled I believe. So if I look for my fulfillment to be found in praise from people I will be disappointed. My worth is not found in the husband I hooked or the children I have bore. It is in God and it is in loving and serving those He has put in my life. This is a daily challenge and I believe that we all do need encouragement and to be reminded that our hard work is appreciated. But am I willing to keep serving those I love even if there is no appreciation shown? Yes, I believe I should be, because God does everyday.
That's my day...maybe it got you thinking.
So here is the whole story. Tonight was supposed to be left-overs night (I have been meal planning and it has actually been going quite well and has been extremely helpful in eliminating last minute scrambles at 4:30) right...back to left-overs. Apparently there was nothing in the fridge that anyone wanted to eat for left-overs, including "the soup". I don't know why I got so miserable but it just came over me. There really was nothing to eat for supper, I wasn't hungry, but I knew the kids needed to eat so out of desperation I tried to feed them "the soup." Zach was putting up a stink and wouldn't even sit at the table and Nadiya, so respectfully dumped her bowl and even refused to eat the soda cracker that had come in contact with the vile liquid.
So in my little fit of rage and self-pity I gathered up the bowls dumped them in the garbage, scooped up the dumped soup with my hands and threw it away as well. All the while my husband is standing quietly watching, just waiting to see if in my fit I threw out the rest of the container as well. And I will admit I was going to because I was feeling sorry for myself, but after considering the time and money I put into making it I decided to put the rest in the fridge and I would have lunch for MYSELF tomorrow.
This whole time I am planning this blog and ready to vent about the injustice I experienced as I made my children toast and grapes for supper and "the soup" sits abandoned in the garbage. My husband quietly watched the children as they ate and got them more grapes and some cheese as they asked, while I proceeded to clean the kitchen (I am a cleaner when I am mad).
After supper is finished and the children are content and I am feeling quite unappreciated Nate gets Zach from the table and tells him to say Thank-you, which he does; and then he tells him to "tell mom she is great." He looks and me and says "Mom is grape!" How could I not smile and not feel like I actually am loved.
I have been pondering lately how as a teenager it seemed that all I needed to do was find someone to love and get married and all my needs would be met and I would feel great about myself, and not feel lonely. Some of these things are true. I am blessed to have a wonderful husband who loves me and works hard so I can stay at home. It is beautiful to have someone to share life with, someone to help make decision and someone to share the in the joy and the pain we each face. And no most of the time I am not lonely (because I know Nate is always there).
However, everything is not perfect. Marriage and children bring their own set of challenges. When we get married, even though we know better, we still believe that life will be easier. In some ways it truly is and in other ways things get harder. I know that every woman out there who runs a household; feeding, cleaning, chauffeuring and myriad of other duties can feel unappreciated. I know this happens to me, it happened tonight. I give and give and give and sometimes it seems like it is just expected and it is not appreciated; the time and the effort and the selfless choices I have to make to ensure that my home is in some state of order. Now I do I always do it all right? Do I always make the selfless decision? No, sometimes I am selfish, but believe me when I am it is evident in the state of my home :) and even in the moods of my children.
Life runs better around here when I am serving, so why do I feel like my serving is taken for granted? Because we all take servants for granted. My husbands serves me everyday when he gets up and faithfully goes to work and sometimes I take that for granted. We are created to serve and we need to serve to feel fulfilled I believe. So if I look for my fulfillment to be found in praise from people I will be disappointed. My worth is not found in the husband I hooked or the children I have bore. It is in God and it is in loving and serving those He has put in my life. This is a daily challenge and I believe that we all do need encouragement and to be reminded that our hard work is appreciated. But am I willing to keep serving those I love even if there is no appreciation shown? Yes, I believe I should be, because God does everyday.
That's my day...maybe it got you thinking.
You summed it up nicely.
ReplyDeleteAnd I LOVE cheesy broccoli soup, but my kids don't like it either. They just don't know what they're missing.